Losing someone we love can spark a wide array of emotions, including shock and disbelief, anger, guilt, sadness/depression, emptiness, loneliness, or even relief, especially if the death ends the person’s suffering. Grief can impact our ability to take care of ourselves and others—it can affect our sleep, appetite, memory, concentration, energy level, and motivation. We may feel overwhelmed by all of the necessary tasks related to both the aftermath of the death and ongoing daily living needs. The details surrounding the death can impact our reactions to it, too. Some deaths occur very suddenly and unexpectedly, while others come after at least some forewarning, allowing us to prepare for it. The loved one may have been in pain for a long time before dying, or may have lost consciousness or no longer seemed like the same person inside even before the actual death. Your relationship with the person who passed will also impact how you cope with their loss. Certain experiences of loss come with their own unique grieving process, including deaths by suicide or accidental overdose, deaths from wars/terrorism or due to a violent crime, and the death of a child, among others. We tailor our therapy approach to the needs of each client.

Rituals such as a wake, funeral, memorial service, burial, lighting candles, or sitting shiva exist in various religions and cultures to help people to cope with losing someone they loved. These rituals may support mourners in facing the reality of the loss, allow them to express their feelings, and connect them with their friends/family/greater community who can offer sympathy and practical assistance. People have many different conceptions of what happens after death which may or may not align with what their culture or religion says about this. While no one knows for certain what happens after we die, our beliefs about this can impact how we cope with the loss, so this can be an important issue to discuss in therapy.

Other Types of Losses
While most of us associate grief with the death of a loved one, we can also grieve over experiences such as the death or disappearance of pets, the loss of a job/financial crises, the end of an important relationship, or when adjusting to moving to a new place. People who experience diminished physical abilities due to an illness or accident often grieve over no longer being able to rely on their bodies to the same extent, too.

How Therapy Can Help
Psychotherapy can help you to cope with the impact of this loss on your life, including managing your grief symptoms and all the emotions and practical issues arising from this loss, and assist you in finding ways to eventually move forward with your life. Therapists can also aid in finding additional resources, if needed, to help you to heal and rebuild your life. We hope that through therapy, you will be able to continue to honor your loved one’s memory while deepening a sense of meaning and purpose for your own life.